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Slow down and breathe!

Wherever you turn today, kids and parents are in motion. From car pools to school activities ,to parents working and juggling home; life is running in the fast lane. Our smart tech savy homes contain our world and many of us are not even engaged in the present moment. I see parents at the playground reading their emails while their children are giggling and growing up right in front of them.They are just missing all these moments that will never come again. As much as we rely on our devices to function day to day, we must turn them off to interact with our kids. Do you want them to remember that moment, your eyes off them as they look for your reaction as they play?Let’s all slow down and try to remember how special it is to enjoy the outdoors and this time with our kids.
You will get more out of your life by simplifying your moments .

Fall is a time of Routine

As we organize and settle into school, we begin a fresh new routine. Routine is necessary in life and makes us all feel whole. It is the time of year we begin new projects and patterns. Life turns inward and the daily routine gives us structure and focus in our days.

This Fall, try to find a pocket of time that can be shared. Whether it be a walk in the park , time to create or time to stare into the beautiful trees of crimson and gold. Slow down because in these moments we fully embrace life.Try to park your technology if you can and explore the world around you. It is a fun season that you don’t want to overlook. Take advantage of the hayrides and the pumpkin picking. Share some hot chocolate with your kids and tell stories around the fire. Some of the best times in life are simple moments.
Create simple moments that you can share with those you love.

A mother’s thought about a son graduating from college

This May, my son graduates from college with his B.F.A. degree. Like most mothers, I am so very proud. Yet, my story is a journey through the highs and lows of having a son who has learning issues on the Autism Spectrum.
When my son began college, I became his school aide. Having great difficulty with executive functions, I became his organizer and planner. He was sharp with his work , but needed help to navigate the process. We worked side by side, setting up weekly and even daily meetings to discuss the projects due . I developed a homework plan that compensated for his challenges with learning. The planning worked very well and he excelled with his projects. He worked at his own pace, taking three classes at a time . Focusing on less, helped him to handle the workload . The classes were six hours long in his specialty, so he had to have some modifications.

I always told him to run his own race!!! This piece of advice helped him to see that each one of us has a method that works toward success! So he paced himself and worked towards his B.F.A. over the course of 9 years, taking 2 years off in between his associate and bachelor degree.

His grades reflected A’s and B’s which gave him great confidence in his accomplishments. His journey took longer than most but with less pressure he was able to perform at his best level.Sometimes , it is not how fast you are but how steady and determined you are that truly matters. He never thought of quitting for a moment.

I stood by him and got him through all the challenges, the planning, the late night courses I drove him to because his medication would make him very sleepy at the end of the day. The pep talks, the conversation around the table after the long day. He knew he had a support system. That is so key for students that are on the spectrum. What is most important is to have the support and love of parents and siblings. We were a village for him and because of his drive and our loving support, he made it!!

On May 18, 2017, he graduates!!! I am beyond words!!! He has taught me more valuable lessons about being the best mom I could be.

This moment is my gift for Mother’s day. I am truly very blessed!

The Sacred Role of Motherhood

The gift of a beautiful child in our life is a precious blessing in our life. Our care is of utmost importance in their lives. We have gotten away from the fundamentals of nurturing a child. Life today has been a world of distractions. Between the technology, the hurried lifestyle, the overwhelming choices, the need to raise super children, we have all gotten away from the pure, simple basics of child rearing.

Raising children is one of the hardest jobs in the world. The world knows it is challenging and often demoralizes the role in our culture. Motherhood is a noble profession. It requires a great deal of inner strength, multitasking, flexibility and resourcefulness. The hours are very long, the demands are overwhelming and the results are utterly transforming. We lose our sense of self in the work and find a greater purpose in our own life.Broader worlds open up to us and we learn to interact in new worlds that affect our children. In this great journey , we learn the cycles of human life and our impact on our children’s lives. It is a journey of a lifetime, so lets do our absolute best to raise our children well. We affect society and the future of mankind in our work. How very important our job is to society. Don’t accept any ridicule and commentary. Stand up to the value of this all encompassing mission in life. Motherhood is truly the ultimate sacred mission in life.

Raise your children with great love. You are the first person in their life to give them pure love. Let them understand the comfort and grace of love. Teach them righteousness.It is so very important that our children know right from wrong. They must develops a moral compass within themselves.Raise them with faith and love. Teach them about God and their need to pray in life. Let them see that the moral law is the ultimate answer in life.

Teach them to become law abiding citizens and learn to respect one another. In order to build a better society, we must value the world we live in. It is important that we care about one another; that children know the value about being part of the village. We can only survive by recognizing our need to unite. As mothers, we are responsible for shaping perspectives and attitude. Educate your children to see all sides of a situation. Help them to make good judgements.

Teach them tolerance and positive thinking so that they can live their lives in hope and possibility. Teach them social skills and explore their inner feelings. Often, they need to talk about situations that affect them with friends and school. Have an open ear!

The best conversations are the one’s that happen casually. You may be cutting vegetables in the kitchen, driving them to an activity or relaxing while watching TV. When the moment your child opens up , pay attention. It only comes once and our kids need our ear and guidance. Listen and advise!

But most of all, practice individualized parenting. Each child is unique and needs that one to one attention. Take the opportunity to enjoy their company by spending the day with them while you build a bond that lasts a lifetime. Not only will you clearly understand them well; your child may feel that they can confide in you even more because of this heartfelt relationship. Plant seeds of knowledge and wisdom in these golden moments.You are helping to shape a strong, independent, confident, loving individual.

The amazing journey of motherhood opens up like a rose along a trellis. As each petal fold opens gently, our inner soul magnifies love and we grow in spirit with our child.Two souls linked in the precious beauty of love. This sacred journey of togetherness can only be experience ONCE in your child’s life. Let’s leave a lasting imprint that rises with the sun!

One Mom’s Inspiring Story

There are many single mom’s raising children on their own today. They work hard and dedicate themselves to their families. I applaud their efforts to give the best home for their dear children.

Recently, I met a mother with a nine year old son who has inspired me with her love.

She works as a waitress nights and weekends and devotes her time to her son and home.
She tries to be everywhere for him. She gets him ready in the morning for school, meets him at the bus, helps him with school work and sets up his dinner as she prepares for her night job. She dresses for her job, has a sitter watch her son and prepares for a long night of waiting tables until 11p.m.She gets home with little time for herself, goes to sleep for the night and begins the same routine the next day. She never complains. She is so happy to have work and her beautiful son in her life.

When I met her son, he was so well behaved and talk about how lucky he was to have his mother. He drew me a picture of her. She had lines around her head. When I asked her what that meant , she said his mom is like an angel, with a halo around her head.

Such a beautiful love story of mother and son. I thought that they may not have a lot of things in their life but they have what matters, a great love and devotion for each other.
They have the greatest abundance of joy in their lives.

I am sure there are many single mom’s with the same story. I applaud their devotion and love for family.

Love, tolerance and helping others

The recent events that have tragically wounded Orlando, Florida are shocking.The hatred towards American’s. The pure lack of humanity leads me to ask so many questions. How does a man’s heart turn to stone? How does one reach a dark place where human life does not matter? He must have been an innocent child once! How can one turn so evil over a lifetime ? Yet, he did the unthinkable, shooting 50 beautiful human beings in a most callous and evil way.

As a mother who lives in a family of love, I cannot comprehend such an evil deed.
Mothers,fathers and family members it is more important than ever to promote love as the antidote to such darkness. Let us work very hard to teach our children that love is indeed the answer to a more compassionate world.

Our influence on our family to respect and care for one another is the greatest contribution we can make to our society.

Let us teach tolerance to our children. Let us begin with great respect for family members and all cultures. The horror that we are witnessing on TV is our call to action.

Yes, we can turn the tide by raising children who are loving and empathetic to others. We must not tolerate what we see on TV. We must look around us and speak to authorities if we see something that is dangerous in our day to day world.

See something, say something must be our mantra.

As busy as all families are today, we must make time and plant the seeds of kindness into our child’s life. We have a moral obligation to raise our children with goodness.
All good must begin at home. That is why a parent has a huge responsibility when raising a family. Get back to the simple code of moral conduct. Our world is grasping for
this light. We have a great influence on our children.

Let us use our power to bring tolerance, kindness and love back into our world!!!

The time is now!!!!

Managing our Technology

We are a culture of gadgets. Technology is a huge influence in our children’s lives.These tools are very helpful in our lives, but they should have limits.

Often, our kids are going to bed with their tablets and phones; not unplugging from the outside world.They need boundaries regarding their usage. Doctors today suggest that the blue light emitting from devices affects our ability to go to sleep. Kids need to understand that a structured bedtime routine is necessary for health and well being.

Turn off the technology and read a book at night. Develop a nice relaxing bedtime ritual that will ease our children into a pleasant nights rest. They will perform better in school and will have more energy to thrive in an ever changing world.

Finding internships for college

My son and I went on an active campaign for a summer internship. The search required my involvement as well as my son. My son has aspergers in the autism spectrum. Our lives have been intertwined all through the stages of life. I am his advocate, his cheerleader, his personal assistant and his mother. I want only the very best for him, but I must let him lead the way. It is his life and his dreams. I am just the task master helping him to find his horizons.

My sons greatest success came from hard work and dedication to a goal. We’ve always paired up because the teamwork kept him focused and on task.Whether I was his study aid or devils advocate, we worked together to succeed at the job at hand.

When tackling the task of applying for internships, we had dueling laptops across from each other at the kitchen table. I searched and he applied to what he was interested in. The system worked fine and he sent out many applications with his portfolio attached. Routine is important to my son, so we would approach the applications this way a couple of times a week, always at the kitchen table .

He did get responses which he was thrilled about. Now , I began to coach him on the elements of interviewing and dressing for the interview. For Matt, grooming has always been a struggle. He does not like the feel of a razor on his skin. The tactile sensitivity is great due to Aspergers. But , since our culture makes opinions on first impressions, he has to overcome those issues. I would ask him to shave everyday , even though he hated it. I was trying to get him to overcome his struggles. Dressing for success is another topic that can be rigid. He has favorite clothes that he loves. Wearing something new and different sometimes feels awkward.I work with him to overcome his anxiety and feel confident about the way he looks and speaks in the interview. Special needs adult children still need personal attention to succeed. In this highly competitive world, we, as parents need to help our kids toward success. In the case of special needs, that time is great. But the results of a happy smile and a winning interview is the best outcome of all.

Those Three Words

“I love you” is on of the nicest phrases you can say to your children, yet many parents overlook the need to express
their feelings in this hurried world we navigate.The comings and goings of daily life creates many conversations on the go. Our conversations are important but talking about our feelings is essential to the well being of our family.

In our day, we talk about our daily events but do we open or close the day with a simple, “I love you”? Try to take a moment out and think about this. Our children are so thirsty for our love, particularly in this caustic world we struggle to navigate.When you are with your small child, try ending the day with a story or a conversation. Tuck them in with a kiss and say I love you. It’s a wonderful way to end your day together.

For your teen, knock on their bedroom door and see how they are doing. They may have a story to share about their day or a frustration to vent. This is your opportunity to listen and love them. Just being present can fill a void in their day and quiet their angst.

If you have adult kids, grab your phone and text them. You know they will get back when you message them. Let them know you are thinking of them and sending them your love. Make a date and visit them. Take the time to build your relationship. It is the best way to foster closeness.

Sharing our feelings is just a matter of being mindful of your important role as Mom. After all, our family is our most important treasure. Take the time to express your heart. It will lift your hearts up and bring you closer together.

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